Joel Welch
Twenty-five years is a long time. Life moves out from under you in a flash but twenty-five years? So much can happen and does happen…some of it in the most amazing way and others less so.
Slightly over twenty-five years ago, I left Oslo, Norway and I wasn’t happy about it. I was married and had an incredible three year old son. We had been there for over three years and had enjoyed everything about it….everything. So much so that I had strongly contemplated leaving my career with the Navy and taking a job in Norway….I actually did interview for a position in a town just south of Oslo in a town called Horten for an joint Norwegian-American company…..interviewed and accepted the job only to have it pulled later due to not being that special…I thought I was special but the Norwegian government did not and so back to the US we went.
But, I never forgot about this place….it made a lasting mark on me and my family. We eventually moved back to the east coast of the US and then across the country to a place called Poulsbo in Washington State mainly because it was as close to Norway as we could get in the US. We had Norwegian memories all over Washington house; an antique rosemaling trunk from Telemark, antique Norwegian skis, any number of busy and colorful Norwegian sweaters….potential Christmas sweaters in the waiting…. Christmas time….we decorated the tree in Norwegian stuff and gulped mulled wine like it was water. Well, you get the picture.
Inexplicably, I never went back…..at least, not until now. I hoped my long lost love affair with this country could be re-energized after all these years and I looked forward to it with great anticipation. Twenty-five years and still in love. Sometimes though, finding that spark isn’t as easy as it seems it should be. I was a very willing lover but it is all about chemistry isn’t it? Sometimes you can’t recreate it no matter how much you want to.
That’s how I feel about Oslo now. I want to feel it and I am willing to feel the love but I can’t quite recreate the moment. She is just as lovely as I left her late in 1993…just as alluring…just as “grab you by the heart” gorgeous but there is something missing.
Oslo is an incredibly appealing city…a provincial town compared to Copenhagen and Stockholm which are clearly world cities. Still, it has a small town charm in a beautiful setting…ringed by mountains and setting along the Oslo Fjord, it is stunning. It has a rich history and its people are proud Norwegians. Oslo works as well….great connections throughout the city via subway, light rail, heavy rail and buses….it is so easy to maneuver. It is even laced with hundreds of kilometers of groomed, lit ski trails in the winter…just an amazing thing really.
I stayed in an area that was brand new when I was here before….the Aker Brygge….a harbor area that was quite the rage way back when. It has been expanded and now is dominated by high rises and fancy properties….and by restaurants and bars. I placed myself there because it is close to everything and as with most things, brings back very fond memories for me.
This, however, is where I started to see the wrinkles and age spots of this relationship. I liked the area and liked the restaurants and bars available to me but as you may have heard, Oslo is an incredibly expensive place to consume food…any food. Beer, wine and spirits….oh my! So what seemed like a good place to drop in for this amateur foodie turned out to be a huge disappointment. I think the Norwegians are willing to eat well but just aren’t capable unless they don’t care about keeping a roof overhead. What this means is that going out to try something new is almost prohibitive…you can’t afford to swing and miss. And because of this, restaurants are few and far between. What ends up happening is that even in a well heeled area like I was living, you get a number of different ways to eat a hamburger or fish balls and little else. Beer is generally $12 a pint and so between a burger and fries and a pint, you are gonna cough up $60…ouch. Pay for two and string a couple of beers together and the next thing you know is you are taking out a pay day loan. Takes the fun right out of it. The quality is great mind you but at the end of the day, it is still a burger and a lager. There are many reasons for this high price. Food itself is pricy here as they have to bring in most of it, although they do have locally produced beef as well as several breweries which make, for the most part, generic but clean, crisp lagers. The other issue, as I understand it, is that Norway requires a living wage for restaurant help. I don’t really want to get into the politics of this here but what I described above is the outcome. And thus, making a profit in the restaurant business in Norway is a daunting task….left primarily to flipping high priced burgers and churning out pizzas, thai food and kebabs.
Thus, while my highly anticipated romantic rendezvous with my Norse girlfriend wasn’t a rousing success, it was a beautiful eye-candy filled journey. What Norway doesn’t deliver in cuisine, it more than makes up for in sheer beautiful scenery. I mean it is everywhere and I only stayed in Oslo for this trip. The west coast is stunning and is what you would expect out of a place like this….eye-popping beauty around every corner. The sometimes neglected interior is just as gorgeous but in a different way….the Hardangarvidda Plateau dominates the middle of the southern half of the country and offers exquisite hiking and camping.
I guess the bottom line is really this…if you view Norway as the National Park of Scandinavia and treat it as a visual journey which it is without compare, then it will not disappoint in the least….in fact, it will awe you. That is what it is great at and it delivers. But if you have aspirations to see the same girl you dated in high school at your 25th reunion, you are in for a lot of disappointment. Guess what? You have both changed and that, my friend is what life is all about.